Friday, 29 May 2015

Overheard on the Eurostar to Brussels...

The Eurostar
"They call us roast beefs."
"Ooh does?"
"The French."
"Oh aye."
"Anybody want grapes?"
"I was looking forward to those crisps."
"Is that 50 Shades of Grey?"
"Ee wouldn't get past page one!"
"Tickets please!"
"Not very fast is it!"
"We haven't started yet."
"T'only takes hour an' 10 minutes."
"You what?"
"It's me left leg that needs exercise."
"Oh aye! Wait till we get int tunnel ant' lights go off!"
"Anymore of them grapes?"
"Ee 'ad nice soft hands, though."
"They might think you're an illegal."
"Me ears are going."
"Aye up! We're in France."
[We hadn't entered the tunnel at this point]
"We're all int same hotel – three nights."
"You never know, people might want to do different things."
"And ee never twigged?"
"I think the first one was your barbecue."
"I thought there was something stupid about that email."
"The Munich one?"
"Not sure, it didn't make much sense."
"But it was worth it just to see your face."
"Anne's got big sunglasses."
"They're the trend now."
"I used to 'ave big sunglasses but people used to laff at me and call me David Bowie."
"I'm just polishing up me French 'ere!"
"Bon jours!"
"She's got one of these smartphones from Sainsbury's: £12 a month..."
"Has 'e guessed anything yet?"
"He was saying to me 'do you know where we're going?'

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